Roger Federer Interview Photo

TennisCrowd: Hello Mr. Federer, thank…
Roger Federer: Please, you know you can call me Roger.

TennisCrowd: Ok, Roger. Thanks for talking to TennisCrowd.com. You’re quite the celebrity and we’re not the most popular tennis blog out there.
Roger Federer: Always have time for you, Scott.

(We sit down)

TennisCrowd: Tough loss to Nadal last year at the French. But overall, how’ve you been playing these days? From the looks of it things are going well. What happened last year against Nadal?
Roger Federer: I think you have an American slang saying that explains it…against him, I have, um, brain gas? No…mind flatulence? No…

TennisCrowd: A brain fart?
Roger Federer: Yes! That’s it, right. Against Nadal I was brain farting.

TennisCrowd: I see…well, it looks to me like you’re getting closer to finally figuring him out on clay and playing very well overall. Congratulations on your recent win in Madrid.
Roger Federer: Yes, I feel the same. How about you though? How have you been playing?

TennisCrowd: Me? I’ve been playing fairly well too. I doubt I’d be able to take a set off you again but my backhand is really coming around. I switched to a two-hander last year.
Roger Federer: Good! Glad to hear that!

Roger and Mirka

TennisCrowd: The other big news is that you’re about to be a father, congratulations to you and Mirka!
Roger Federer: Thank you. It is going to be a new challenge for me.

TennisCrowd: So, tell me, what’s your unborn fetus’ ranking on the junior circuit?

Roger Federer: 1,789 right now. I’m sure it will improve. Not much of a serve at this point. Problems with the ball toss, balance, strength, etc.

TennisCrowd: That makes sense considering the age.
Roger Federer: True. How about you? Any kids there in Seattle? Seattle is a great American city.

TennisCrowd: No kids for me. Seattle is nice. Ever travel there? We should play sometime.
Roger Federer: Absolutely! Last time I was there I went to La Carta de Oaxaca in Ballard. Trendy Mexican food in Seattle’s hottest neighborhood. I heard the courts were recently re-surfaced at Lower Woodland near Greenlake. You play there I assume? Crazy bunch of players there!

(Laughs)

TennisCrowd: On another topic, what’s is on your iPod these days?
Roger Federer: I mainly kick it to 50 cent, The Game, and Fat Joe & Ja Rule.

(Roger starts rapping)

Roger Federer: “You got blown over the jack? – That ain’t gangsta – Your Man ran when you got clapped? – That ain’t gangsta – Rockin’ a vest with no gat? – That ain’t gangsta…”

(Roger smiles)

TennisCrowd: Ok…um, back to tennis, how do you feel about your French Open chances?
Roger Federer: Honestly? Not good. I would like to win in the dirt but I really struggle against certain players as we discussed.

(Roger stops smiling)

TennisCrowd: Aw, keep that head up there, tiger. Will you be entering the doubles draw at Wimbledon?
Roger Federer: Yes, I’d like to play doubles there. Would you like to enter as my partner? I could really use you…you’re rated 4.0 you say?

TennisCrowd: Oooh, thanks for asking. Normally I’d jump at the chance…but my USTA team has a league match that weekend. Sorry.
Roger Federer: I understand…maybe the US Open or sometime sooner?

(Roger appears visibly upset)

TennisCrowd: We all know about your on-court escapades, what about off the court? What else do you like to do?
Roger Federer: Off the court I still train, of course. But I also like to chill out and knock back a couple shots of Jack Daniels while playing Call of Duty 4 and Rock Band on my XBOX 360. Also, Mirka and I enjoy yodelling, collecting watches, and tending to the farm.

TennisCrowd: Who wouldn’t enjoy that? The JD and XBOX that is. I’m a huge Rock Band fan. What do you play?
Roger Federer: I usually sing even though I prefer hardcore rap. Mirka drums. She can do “Blackened” by Metallica on Expert. She’s incredible.

TennisCrowd: Wow! I can just do Hard. Anyway, back to tennis, what’s the best advice you have for improving your tennis game?
Roger Federer: That’s a good question, it’s different for everyone. I think at the recreational level players too often focus on their weaknesses. Practice your strengths too. Make them real weapons on the court; that will give you great confidence. The Swiss have a saying, “You learn through mistakes – no one was born a master.” It’s good advice.

TennisCrowd: Excellent advice. Well, you better get back to the practice courts. Thanks again for talking to TennisCrowd.com, Roger. It’s great you had the time to come out to do this.
Roger Federer: Anytime! TennisCrowd.com is great…the pros on tour get a BIG kick out of you. We’re always huddling around the Internet kiosks to read what you have to say next.

TennisCrowd: Nice to hear. Continued good luck at Rolland Garros!
Roger Federer: Thanks!

Disclaimer: By “interview” we mean “what we’re guessing he would say”. By no means should the answers here be mistaken for actual answers that Roger Federer would give in an actual interview setting. If this were an true interview, you’d probably know it. This Q&A was completely made up and does not reflect much of anything other than an attempt at humor. We would absolutely like to interview Mr. Federer in person sometime but he’s a busy man. Hopefully in the near future an actual interview will be granted.

I just checked out Andy Murray’s Head YouTek Radical Pro racquet at his new website, the Radical Messenger. Personally, I use the YouTek Speed but it was still cool to see Andy talk about his racquet in the video. Super nice paint job on that stick I think.

As for why my office mates were asking me about Andy? Well, head on over to the Radical Messenger and see for yourself by shooting your friend a message. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll be lucky enough to have the old lady like I did.

Magic 8-ball

Instead of trusting myself, I decided to base some tennis decisions on what a Magic 8-ball tells me. Here’s my conversation:

Me: My racquet might be too heavy. Should I bother trying out some different tennis racquets?
8-ball: My sources say no.

Me: Oh, ok. So I should stick with my current racquet?
8-ball: Outlook good.

Me: Huh. What about the strings? Should I just stick with the Signum Pro?
8-ball: Cannot predict now.

Me: Yeah, strings are tough. Sometimes I feel like they are perfect, other times not. Would a thinner gauge string be better?
8-ball: Don’t count on it.

Me: I know, I know! It’s not the equipment, it’s the player. Will I have a good practice tonight?
8-ball: Yes, definately.

Me: Sweet. I always like a good practice. How about cheese? Should I smear cheese all over my grip to hold onto it better?
8-ball: It is certain.

Me: Huh, cheese? Really?
8-ball: Most likely.

Me: I was with you about the string thing but now I’m not so sure. Do you know what you’re talking about tennis-wise?
8-ball: Signs point to yes.

Me: Ok, if you say so. Same racquet, maybe the same strings, but spread cheese all over the grip. Got it. Will I make it to the finals of the Silver Lake singles tournament by doing this?
8-ball: As I see it, Yes.

Me: Hmm…I’m really not much of a singles player, are you certain?
8-ball: It is decidly so.

Me: Wow, confident. Will I win that final?
8-ball: My sources say no.

Me: Bummer. Though the finals would be cool. Should I wear a skirt to the match?
8-ball: Outlook good.

Me: That’s what I thought you’d say. Should I also play the match barefoot?
8-ball: Very doubtful.

Me: Yeah, then I’d look silly. Anyway, my backhand remains a problem. Should I switch to a two-hander?
8-ball: Ask again later.

Me: Alright…I suppose it merits careful consideration. Hmm…what else should we talk about? How about the French Open? Can you predict the winner?
8-ball: Yes.

Me: Cool. It’s going to be Nadal isn’t it?
8-ball: Cannot predict now.

Me: But you just said you could…will Roger Federer finally win the French?
8-ball: Concentrate and ask again.

Me: (Concentrating) Ok, will Roger Federer win the 2006 French Open?
8-ball: Very doubtful.

Me: I knew it! It’s Nadal isn’t it?!
8-ball: My sources say no.

Me: Well then it should be an interesting open indeed! Not Federer or Nadal! Well, it was great talking with you. Did you have a good time too?
8-ball: Without a doubt.

So there you have it. According to the wisdom of the 8-ball, neither Federer nor Nadal will be winning the French Open.

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